I spent the better part of my life trying to fit in with the popular crowd. Standing on the outside just hoping to get a chance to “be” something. It always intrigued me (sort of like the mall is to a shopaholic), the way the popular folk moved and interacted with one another. Something about how I saw them, made me believe that I would find fulfillment in being accepted by them.
What I realized over time, and oftentimes have to be reminded by, is that I lacked that love for myself. I was searching for that love that others would give me and oddly enough never finding it in others.
The gaping truth is that I needed to find it in me.
By standing back and observing these types of groups, what I have found is that they all are just people. People with insecurities, shortcomings, great personalities, poor personalities, and the list goes on. They are just humans just as I am. We are finite beings and I have been desiring a temporary fulfillment.
After the sun sets what I’m left with is that I am good enough. I believe in me more and more as each day passes as each occasion to decline people-pleasing arises – I am finding fulfillment in being myself and seeing a strength I hadn’t recognized before.